1:00 pm It doesn’t get better than this! As I delight in this glorious autumn afternoon, I’m perched on my front porch, nestled in my favourite rocking chair, which is well acquainted with and contoured to my old lady’s posterior. The day is a little chilly, but I’m wrapped in my plaid Snuggle. You know — that blanket with sleeves that everyone wished they’d invented.
My beautiful maple tree stands shamelessly half naked in front of me, showing off the remains of its flaming yellow, orange and red leaves. My imagination gets the best of me, and I can envision them talking to each other. “Hang on boys, here comes another breeze. Hang tight to your branches. Wait! Oh no! There goes Joe. Joe! Look, he’s falling! Oh no. Say it ain’t so Joe. Goodbye Joe. We’ll miss you.”
1:20 pm Quiet. Then, above my head, half a dozen ducks fly over my rooftop. I wave. “Goodbye, guys. Safe flight, and here’s hoping all guns aimed in your general direction jam. And just so you know, if you would just shut up and stop that infernal quacking, maybe the hunters wouldn’t even know you were there. Just sayin’.”

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​From a very young age, I was taught that if I wanted success or to obtain what I desired, I would need to fight, force, control, and anticipate the worst and overcome it.

Well, I’m here to tell you that philosophy doesn’t work. Here’s what I’ve learned.

Life is Not Random
My belief system was nothing more than barely controlled chaos. The Universe needed me to scooch over and get the heck out of the way.

I was filling my mind and soul with worry, stress, and doubt that wasn’t fixing or creating anything but more of the same. It added nothing to my well-being and took up precious space that the natural flow of the Universe could have filled.

In my early fifties, I knew my highly paid executive/legal assistant job was coming to an end. My boss was drawing closer to retirement, and the international law firm I worked for had started weeding expensive staff out and replacing us with younger, half-the-price employees.

I needed that job and had nothing saved for retirement! What would I do? Where would I go? Who would hire me at my age?

So when I returned part-time to college at the age of 53 to follow my dream of becoming a travel agent, I came up with a whole new set of angst. All I could think about was who would hire an old, inexperienced person like me? How could I sell vacations to people who were more well-travelled than I? They’re going to quickly discover I’m a charlatan. How was I ever going to pay back the student loans and credit card debt I had spent on this outlandish idea? Just who did I think I was fooling?

I was consumed with doubt and fear of failure rather than the excitement of starting a new chapter in my life. I hadn’t even considered all the impressive skills and experience I had accumulated over my lifetime, and I was more than capable of transferring them to my new career.

Fear Will Give You More of the Same
The Universe doesn’t respond to desire; it responds to state of mind. I could want something with all my heart, but if my energy and aura were shouting fear and lack, the Universe was going to feel it and give me more of the same. I could meditate or repeat positive mantras until chickens grew teeth, but if, deep down, I was still clinging tightly to my lack, the dominant frequency remained fear.

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